Bars and clubs: the frats and parties of the Real World. The locations where one is expected to dress up and “meet people.” You label it a “good night” if you meet someone attractive and get their number, a “bad night” if you didn’t meet anyone at all.
I miss my college night life when our bars were filled with people we knew, when frat basements were really our clubs, and dorm rooms could fit massive amounts of people in them to be labeled as fire hazards. If you had a crush on someone, you knew where to find them and you knew you would “accidentally run into them” by the end of the night.
None of that exists anymore. Out in the Real World you walk into a bar or club and don’t know anyone. If you have a crush on someone it’s only because they are good-looking, and you have to think of a pick up line to see if they can hold a conversation. The other option is to play cat and mouse, and because others are competing by doing the same thing, there is no guarantee you’re the mouse they really want to talk to…
Thank god I avoid looking for my future husband when it comes to my Real World night life. Though I have heard stories of happily married couples that happened to meet at such locations, I personally can’t say I plan to do the same. The picture of me scurrying around while a cat stalks me is not my cup of “cheese.”
So how do you meet people??
Recently I took Oil Painting, Spanish, and Improvisation classes. I found out I’m a skilled oil painter who just needs more experience, a beginner Spanish speaker who can whip out “Me llamo Hana, Como se llama?” and that I absolutely adore the challenge of getting up on stage and making stuff up on the spot. I MET PEOPLE. And sure I went on a few dates. But that's besides the point.
The classes were the best; they truly provided something to look forward to each week. I especially bonded with my improvisation class because it was filled with young adults like me who sought to break out of their comfort zones and have a good time. It became a tradition to grab food, a few beers, and see a show after class. The best part is that we range completely in age, what we're doing, and what we want to do - but we share the love for comedy and inspiration to get better. It's a support group! It's just not anonymous ... yet.
So if you have time amidst your busy work/(or non-work) schedules, take a class that has always interested you. You are bound to find someone with your interests, perhaps a new group of friends, and who knows – maybe it’ll lead to a cat & cat situation. Screw mice.
Just finished reading all of your LWWO posts - so awesome, can't wait for more!
ReplyDeleteI'm happy that you're finding your niche in life... I found mine while I was traveling/living abroad for 3 years after college. College was fun, but I still felt like a confused child with very little life experience, who was bored of doing the same thing everyday. But while I was traveling, I was writing every single day about events, discoveries, revelations.. and I reached this unbelievably healthy confidence in myself that I wished I could share with everyone.
The problem was that as soon as I came back, I fell right back into that rut again, and only through writing did I really bounce back from that.
So.. what I'm trying to communicate to you, is that I hope you will keep writing, and keep using it as your form of meditation and reflection - it'll help you through all your obstacles, and even if it doesn't, at least you'll have records of your obstacles that you or your children can read back on when you're 80 years old.
-Aura