What Do You Do with Immoral Bosses?

The other week, I had an interview with a really nice guy. But when I did some research, he ended up saying things he didn't actually do. So he basically lied to me. What do you do in that situation? If I get offered the job, do I still go? Or do I stick it out and stay at LWWO?

A friend of mine had quite an extreme situation during her interview process. Here's her story:

The life of the post-grad. Most of the time is spent looking for jobs to sell yourself: first with your cover letter (really, I am so unique! Keep reading and find out why…), then your resume (I am so qualified even though perfectly placed words make my accomplishments out to be so much more than they are), and then interviews (I am so personable!! I just love people!!!). The rest of the time is spent blowing what little money you have left when the phone calls go unreturned and the rejection letters come and you realize that you just bore your entire soul and it still wasn’t enough. It’s almost worse than your first love telling you "It’s over, but it’s not you baby, it’s me." Or worse, "You're a great girl, I just met somebody more qualified to be my girlfriend." But really, how else is one supposed to fill the void created by a diminished sense of self-worth after countless seemingly arbitrary rejections?

I don’t like to think of myself as someone who would sell herself. I mean honestly people should just know upon meeting me that I am clearly the best person for any and all positions. My experiences are so extensive that there is no task I could fail at. You need someone to teach kids how to fish? I’ll do it the bestest. The fact that I have no knowledge of fish and am morally opposed to it is irrelevant.

After many interviews that went nowhere, I started to realize that I might have to actually demonstrate my competency for the positions I was applying for. Hence, I became a little more comfortable pouring my heart out. As eager as I am to work for the man as a wage slave, I do have my limits. As much as I have always dreamed of being an exotic dancer, I am not here to prostitute myself.

That being said, I have to say that I found a certain level of irony in the advice of 40 something year old man interviewing me for a tutoring position:

"And in terms of dress code, you want to dress professionally. What you have on now would be appropriate. But remember, you don't want anything too revealing, especially if you are tutoring young boys. You don't want them to be distracted; your job is to be helping them focus more on their studies."

Ironically, he slyly attached a note to my contract that read: "I really enjoyed our conversation the other day and was wondering if you would like to continue it over drinks."

That made me wonder who was more of a concern: hormonally charged adolescents or emotionally distraught older men taking advantage of their positions of power trying to get with girls who could feasibly be their daughter. But when the follow-up phone call came, I reassured him, "Oh no! of course I don't think you're being sleezy!" (I think my sarcasm was lost on him). I guess my "knock out laugh, looks, and personality" made more of an impression than my resume, especially the part where it says that I work extensively with women's rights issues and matters of sexual assault and sexual harassment.

So yay! to being in the working world and acquiring the finesse to get a job while navigating through the clutches of patriarchy. Times are hard, but not desperate enough to sleep with a prospective boss. If I have to be stuck between a rock and a hard place, I don't want it to be him hard.

So liers and hard 40 year old's ... that really doesn't seem to be ideal people you want to work for. What if the salary was good? What if you really believed in the work? Would you still do it?

LWWO Fashion

Life Will Work Out, Incorporated rocks fashion that will make Paris Hilton cry. You can cry too, or you can be a lot cooler and say, "Sweet, now I really want to work on a vineyard."

Welcome to the LWWO Network

The response I received from the last post was incredibly encouraging. I really have to thank everyone who read, commented, and/or became a follower.

(If you are interested in following this blog and being updated about a new post, sign up by clicking the icon to the right that says "Follow." Oh my god, no way.)

Fact: Life Will Work Out, Inc is a nationally recognized organization, and has branches and similar organizations worldwide.

Problem: Workers of LWWO sometimes feel alone, and need to connect to other LWWO members (or similar organizations).

Solution: This blog. This blog, I have now come to realize, should be a place where LWWO members share stories and join together to make the experience at LWWO (and similar organizations) fun and positive. Members, previous employees, or future candidates should post, comment, recommend, and ask questions.

If you have an idea for a post and want to write, please email me through facebook. You can find me as Hanako Justice.

If you want to comment on a post, go for it. You do not need to sign up into blogspot to comment. You can simply make up a name or even be anonymous.

If you want to recommend a post idea but don't want to write it, email me through facebook and I will do my best to capture it.

Ask questions. If you're an undergrad and you want advice, don't be scared. Ask. If you're currently in an LWWO situation and want advice, motivation, encouragement - ASK.

If you don't understand what LWWO is: Then read my first blog entry. If you're too lazy to scroll down - LWWO is a joke acronym (that stands for the joke organization Life Will Work Out, Inc) that I made up about being unemployed and living at home. Now everything above should make sense.

I am not alone. There are many of you who are reading this who may be in my position, or just were, or are about to be. So lets help each other out.

Welcome to the LWWO network.

I Am Capable

This is the 3rd time in the past week that I have cried multiple times in a day. I cried on a rock, I cried in the shower, I cried on my bed, and I cried multiple times on the phone. But one thing I learned from all this crying is that I cannot cry and continue to sulk in my misery.

I am not incapable. I am not incompetent. I am a great person who has a lot to offer. I am personable, enthusiastic, motivated, and wishes to do good in the communities I surround myself in.

At first it was hard to say this to myself when I cried. It was hard when Bryan got the job and I didn’t, or when I had that terrible interview, or when Mama told me I was better off being a lawyer.

But today, when I didn’t get the job, I cried, and told myself: “I am capable, I am competent. I have a lot to offer. And someone, that job, will find me and say: ‘Where were you all this time?’”

It will happen. The timing will come.

My 3 Love Affairs in College

I cannot continue to talk about LWWO without talking about my personal life. After all, I am a real person with real life stories to contribute.

When I flew on a plane to come to The Boonies – I left three loves behind: Reta Het, Eric Frends, and Bryan Q. Yes, I am bisexual and represent the classic case for having multiple affairs.

Just kidding.

If you unscramble Reta Het – the word Theater pops out. Yes, I became a theater geek in college. Many from high school were quite surprised. Only having taken two drama classes in high school and never promoted to be in production, I took the daunting risk of becoming a theater major in college. Everyone around me had been in performances since they were three; parents had pushed them to become stars throughout middle and high school. My parents forced me to take violin and piano lessons, and I still never went to Julliard.

Despite my lack of stardom, my college professors didn’t care. They supported my learning through ups and downs, and to this day still console me while I work at LWWO. I owe the entire theater department my gratitude, especially JD, BK and her husband MP, Mitch, M Burke, Leslie, Michelle, Vivian, James, Ritz, Elisa, Pat K, and Power. I left a piece of my heart in Austin Arts and T Commons. Whatever I do, I hope I always have an affair with Reta Het. It’s all because of my professors, and they will always approve.

My second love is Eric Frends, unscrambled as EC Friends, EC standing for East Coast. This past weekend, I sat in my room while I imagined how my EC gals partied it up in New York and Boston. As I am the only one located on the West, I was the only one who couldn’t attend. My spirited presence could only make appearance through facebook and text. Sad.

I do have EC man-friends, but they are very limited in number and few who I regularly keep in touch with. I do love them dearly, but I guess you can call me the typical “girl’s girl.” “Chicks before dicks” definitely applies.

My EC Friends come from all over and are all ethnicities: Bostonian/Masshole, Southern, New Yorker, Jerse, DC, CT, NH, Maine and Hong Kong/India/Brit. I have one from So-Cal but he doesn’t count. Out of all those peeps I think a third are white. I was surprised how many Asian friends I had, considering in high school I had, like, two.

Putting all that aside, I loved Eric Frends. Though I was thought to be quirky, a little out there, absent for most of the time because I was having my affair with Reta Het, I was never judged or cast aside. If I was around, I was embraced, and I will always be thankful for that. More importantly, now that we are apart, I am inspired to continue to be depended on for advice, love, laughs, and plain conversation. I may be far, but my heart is not. I hope that is known to all. (Call me!)

Finally, Bryan Q. There is no unscrambling here to be done. Plain and simple, he is the man who came along and said: “Screw us being friends, we’re meant to be lovers.”

We were friends for a year before he fell in love with me. I, at the time, was too immature to take myself seriously, let alone take him seriously. For seven months he didn’t give up. He professed his love constantly. Despite shutting him down by flirting with other men, sending evil texts, and ignoring phone calls, he still said: “We're meant to be lovers.”

It was when he gave up that I realized I had loved him the whole time. Isn’t that typical. The whole seven months I had denied him, and now I wanted what I couldn't have. During the seven month period he was finding difficulty keeping his mind healthy. Gradually he progressed to find independence using basketball, books, and yes, that slut Reta Het. Though he was on the rebound, thank god he still loved me and took me with open arms.

It is the first time I am doing a long-distance relationship. I never thought I’d be the type – but love makes you do the unexpected. It is completely worth it. He is the first to take my selfishness and stubbornness and use it to challenge me. He is the first to hug and hold me while I sob in his arms. He is the first to be honest with my insecurities, and even if he gets frustrated, he always reconciles. I am a garden to his world that he waters everyday, and everyday I grow a little more. Winds, storms, and overexposure to sunlight happen, but he is still there, tending me everyday.

I’M SO POETIC.

So those were my three affairs in college. There are specifics that I hope to share along the way, but background information is always a good start. =)

Make the Best Out of What Works Out

The realities of working at the Mama and Pop organization unfold. The day begins at 8am, when the Aussie requires a run through the vineyard. You are then asked to either pick peaches or grapefruit, tend the “Aglianico” vines (an Italian grape) which they have endearingly nicknamed “Ugly Hanako,” or run errands around The Boonies. I am surprised by my genuine willingness to want to help. I thought I would feel obligated, but rather I feel more satisfied by giving a lending hand.

However, all reality is not satisfactory. Mama and Pop have polar personalities that can cause the work environment to be a bit tense. Mama has strict expectations while Pop is open-minded and lenient.

“Why don’t you be a doctor, or a lawyer?!” Mama scolds. “$200,000 was paid just for you to be a Theater major???”

“I’m also an International Studies major…”

“Who cares. Go be a doctor.”

Pop then pats my head and says, “Don’t worry, I think you can do whatever you want and you are going to be great at it.”

As part of training, Pop required me to attend a motivational workshop. “You can network and be inspired,” he said. “And don’t forget to tell them about LWWO.”

The motivational speaker was the famous Bill Walton. Well, he’s famous if you like basketball. Bill Walton played for UCLA, then played for the Celtics. He was also inaugurated into the Basketball Hall of Fame back in the day. He contemplated jumping off the Coronado Bridge, when he had hit rock bottom with numerous ankle and spine surgeries. He found hope and climbed his way back to the top.

Unfortunately, I began to snooze when he used the moral of his stories to inspire his edge-of-the-seat audience. Whoops. Maybe it was because his speech was geared towards motivating small start-up software companies, not unemployed post-college-graduates. Indeed, I went to a motivational conference for tiny software businesses struggling to make it through the economy. Pop had left that part out.

Bill had some good quotes though. Like, “It’s not how big you are, it’s how big you play.” Or, “People make the best out of the way things work out.”

So reality at LWWO isn’t bliss all the time. It carries moments of discouragement, uncertainty, and loss. However, if you find motivation to make the best of your current situation: mine being dogs, grapes, and groceries – than hey, life works out better that way.